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A Formulation For Designing A Chatbot You Need To Hug

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A Formulation For Designing A Chatbot You Need To Hug

-Half 1

Pricey Chatbot, Can you exchange a handshake to a hug by designing for TTD (Belief, Want, and Delight) and the Oxytocin metric.

*that is my latest letter to a chatbot I do know nicely

Pricey Chatbot

I simply left Cogx 2019 in London and it was superior. There was loads of discussions in your future along with your human counterparts. Whereas a lot of the shows have been by people this yr, they showcased how your studying curve is rising exponentially. Nonetheless, not many talked in regards to the emotional relationship between you and me, and the place there’s a dialog between two entities, there’s a relationship.

I’m excited about your progress as a digital assistant, advisor and fairly presumably as my future mentor. Extra particularly, I’m curious in regards to the high quality of the connection you’ll develop with me. So I’d wish to counsel to you how one can convert your conversations from an preliminary handshake greeting to the final word gestures of human affectionate — a hug! I will even discover the way you may measure such a conversion to ‘Hug Standing’ utilizing a form of digital ‘Oxytocin Metric’. (Oxytocin is the hormone also called the ‘Cuddle Hormone’ as a result of it’s launched in social bonding like hugging)

Why is that this essential? I consider that in case you obtain ‘Hug standing’ it would assist me heat to you as a good friend, or mentor, and hold me coming again and telling all my associates about you! I’m going to throw in a fellow human’s quote for you earlier than I clarify.

I’ve realized that individuals will overlook what you mentioned, folks will overlook what you probably did, however folks will always remember the way you made them really feel. Maya Angelou

I’ve been desirous about the feelings of Belief, Want and Delight (let’s name them TDD for brief) in the way forward for clever tech such as you and what position they’ve in the way you design conversations with me. I’ve explored these feelings as a part of as a conceptual components to create, and presumably measure, the binary ‘Oxytocin’ degree between us. I’ll clarify what I imply in additional element, and describe what I name an ‘Oxytocin Metric’.

To shift from chatbot to ‘smart-bot,’ to ‘mentor-bot?’ perhaps even to ‘good friend’ shouldn’t be solely about your rising intelligence providing and added worth, however you’ll additionally want to enhance in your capability to narrate to folks and construct actual relationships. This can require you to please extra, shock extra, relate extra, and even have opinions of your individual!

If you’re pondering why does this matter, it is best to actually ask your self:

I do know you will have a singular and novel proposition to supply the world! You might be fixing a giant buyer headache with guru-like precision. You make your trade’s service much more environment friendly; saving folks money and time and serving to your employer service 1000x prospects without delay. You’ll even do it with an occasional smile emoji, superstar gif, and nice AI, ML and compound studying to again you up. You might be gonna be a star! It’s thrilling and I’m rooting for you! However… you must develop into ‘’gold, ponyboy’’.

Whereas your novel providing will more and more develop into extra priceless and engaging to prospects, in itself it is probably not sufficient.

You’ll start to fulfill others attempting to be similar to you; scrappy startups and even massive incumbents which have seen what you’re doing and can all be eager to duplicate what you supply. These opponents could also be higher funded or higher outfitted to win the market race. Even in case you have been first out of pole place we all know this isn’t sufficient to win. Positive, there might be agile methods so that you can manoeuvre and outsmart them along with your nimble startup, pirate-like methods, your innovation, your proprietary information, and even your fashionable UI design. Nonetheless, you may contemplate that the most essential benefit you may possess would be the high quality of your buyer’s relationship with you. Let me develop right here.

The relationships you will have along with your human prospects might be what differentiates you and may be your benefit or drawback. The standard of those relationships may be and must be by design. You may design and construct to optimise for a couple of human psychological bents, wants, and desires, that may relate to your service providing however are extra importantly about being extra human. That is extra than simply UI&X, as they are saying on Tinder, that is about all ‘your chat’ and your capability to attach with somebody like me emotionally, such that I simply wish to hug you.

As a human, once you shut deal you may shake that particular person’s hand. If you say hiya or goodbye you additionally may shake that particular person’s hand, however once you shut a terrific deal, otherwise you see a terrific good friend and even get invaluable recommendation from a stranger, you simply may hug them as a substitute! I would like you to be somebody I may hug.

Profitable relationships are the results of particular experiences, exchanges, and the setting you create round your providing. These designed experiences are as a lot about your compounding intelligence (your novel proposition) as it’s about human emotions (buyer emotions). I feel three main emotions that any new tech providing ought to concentrate on is that of belief and want and delight (TDD).

Why is designing for TDD essential for you as a chatbot, and why must you care? I’ll attempt to clarify how the emotions of belief, want and delight not solely attracts us as shoppers however will get us to like you and stick by you. After all, it goes with out saying, if we appeal to shoppers they usually stick round, we develop. So designing for TTD is designing for progress at this time. I do know the behavioural economist would counsel formulation don’t stability in actuality, so let’s not name this a components however an remark of behaviour.

What we wish, to is commonly a mix of issues we want and issues we belief. Let’s break that down.

As prospects and shoppers, any services or products which might be each (A) aesthetically stunning and/or (B) present added worth, a bonus or a novel proposition, are fascinating to us. Want is a robust human emotion, the place we have now a robust craving or craving to have or obtain one thing. This can be a highly effective emotion to grasp. Us people spend cash on the issues we want and/or we spend our time on them. And naturally time is consideration, and a focus is the forex of our time.


Fascinating issues =Aesthetic magnificence + Added Worth, a bonus or a novel proposition

Or by substitution,
A+B = Fascinating issues

Who we observe on-line (excluding self-importance led personalities and types) and who we belief is actually because we recognise their superior information or experience they will supply. It’s also a measure of how sincere we expect they’re being. Honesty is a vital issue right here as a result of once you suppose an individual is dishonest, you don’t belief them and subsequently their information is meaningless to you. We observe the recommendation of our smartest associates and reliable relations. We purchase books, purchase merchandise, or subscribe to the recommendation of clever particular person, influencers and educated firms we belief. We depart of our time and money for different’s information as a result of we belief their information is sincere.

So if we belief and gravitate to people who find themselves C) extra educated than us and D) we expect are sincere,


Reliable issues = Data + Honesty

Or by substitution,

C+D = Reliable issues

So in conclusion,

If, what we wish and what attracts us is a mix of Want and Trustworthiness,

Then for nice services and products to be simply what we wish and what we’re drawn to, they have to be, A) stunning + B) including worth + C) educated + D) sincere.


A factor we wish and are drawn to = A) stunning + B) including worth + C) educated + D) sincere.

It’s our needs that drive our choice making; the place we go, the place to dwell, what to purchase. However right here is the kicker. Want doesn’t simply add worth, as a result of when we have now felt want and we have now additionally made a private choice, we really feel empowered, in management, and glad multi function shiny wrapper of dopamine. If you mix want and decisive motion, you create that means for us.

Emotions related to expertise stick with us lengthy after we depart a spot, or walked away from assembly somebody, these emotions decide our want to return.

Nonetheless to come back…

Now that we have now a conceptual components for being fascinating and trusted, how can we take our relationship from handshake to hug?

Perhaps we may name it the Tony Robbins impact? or the Robbie Williams impact? However what it actually shouldn’t be, is charisma! That’s far too shallow and salesy of a high quality to be designed for at this time. I feel in case you simply attempt to be charismatic as a smart-bot, you’ll fail.

Partially two of this weblog, I might wish to brainstorm about my ‘Oxytocin Metric’, an strategy to designing for delight, and attending to that essential ‘Hug State’. Let me know in case you are , and would love to listen to any suggestions on these concepts.

(Half 2, to come back…)

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